A Favorite Passage

"Deep down, all the while, she was waiting for something to happen. Like a sailor in distress, she kept casting desperate glances over the solitary waters of her life, seeking some white sail in the distant mists of the horizon. She had no idea by what wind it would reach her, toward what shore it would bear her, or what kind of craft it would be – tiny boat or towering vessel, laden with heartbreaks or filled to the gunwhales with rapture. But every morning when she awoke she hoped that today would be the day; she listened for every sound, gave sudden starts, was surprised when nothing happened; and then, sadder with each succeeding sunset, she longed for tomorrow."

Madame Bovary - Gustave Flauber

Caves

"What are men to rocks and mountains?" Jane Austen

Last Friday two of my good friends and I visited the Blanchard Springs Caverns near Mountain View, Arkansas. It really is an amazing experience. I had only been to the cave once before, but that was years ago. I hardly remembered it.

Boy, was it beautiful. I loved every second I was in the caverns. When I look at such beauty, at such a creation, I think: "How could someone not believe in an ultimate creator? At least some kind of higher power? This didn't just happen by accident!" Nature, especially the unique aspects of nature, like the cave, leaves me awestruck and astounded by God's creation. I wish I could walk in that cave every day and be inspired by what I see. Instead, however, I am restricted to memories and pictures. And pictures do the cave no justice at all.

I would rather live my life inspired by the beauty that surrounds me and rejoicing in my God, than completely deny His existence. Even if there wasn't a God, I would rather LIVE and do something worthwhile in my life by living for Him than a life filled with despair and hate. Luckily, I know the existence of my God and His love for me. I see that in the cave, in the trees, in the mountains. I feel His spirit within me, guiding me in my life. I'm so lucky to know Him.

Yes, I am a very lucky girl.

You Can't Please Everyone

It seems like the few times I try to stick up for myself, everything just turns out worse. Why do I have to be such a people pleaser? I guess because I like to see people happy and in a good mood. I can't stand to make someone upset or mad or angry. And when I stick up for myself, that tends to happen. But I refuse to let people walk all over me. Not this time.

It also seems like the few times I try to apologize up front about something I've said or done, something that is unknown to the person I'm apologizing to, everything just turns out worse. But I guess it's better than said person hearing it from someone else... right?

And throughout all of this, one thing I've learned is that even if someone says they aren't mad, they can still be mad.

“To try is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard of life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, live, and love.” Leo Buscaglia